Parashat Lech-Lecha: Parting in Love

Right after the command, “Go forth from your native land and from your father’s house to the land that I will show you” (Genesis 12:1), the beginning of the journey is described this way: “Abram went forth as God had commanded him, and Lot went with him” (ibid., 4). This detail is repeated in the very next verse: “Abram took his wife Sarai and his brother’s son Lot, and all the wealth that they had amassed, and the persons that they had acquired in Haran; and they set out for the land of Canaan.” (ibid., 5). The Torah’s insistence on mentioning Lot suggests something profound about their relationship from the beginning.

When kinship requires parting

Yet soon after arriving in Canaan, conflict emerges. “The land could not support them staying together; for their possessions were so great that they could not remain together. And there was quarreling between the herders of Abram’s cattle and those of Lot’s cattle. The Canaanites and Perizzites were then dwelling in the land. Abram said to Lot, ‘Let there be no strife between you and me, between my herders and yours, for we are, after all, kin. Is not the whole land before you? Let us separate: if you go north, I will go south; and if you go south, I will go north.’” (ibid., 6-9)

Abram and Lot were uncle and nephew, yet Abram calls him “kin” – brother in spirit. The shock lies in what follows: because we are brothers, therefore we must part. This reverses our expectations. Many commentators, uncomfortable with this sentiment, besmirched Lot’s character to justify the separation. But the verses teach something else: there are situations where parting is precisely what preserves brotherhood. And Abram parts generously, letting Lot choose where to go first and declaring he will take the opposite direction.

Brotherhood tested and proven

Only this reading helps make sense of what comes next. A great war breaks out, Lot is taken captive, and his property plundered. When Abram hears what happened, he understands the danger at once: Lot will be enslaved, his women abused, his life forfeited. Without hesitation:

“When Abram heard that his kinsman had been taken captive, he mustered his retainers, born into his household, numbering three hundred and eighteen, and went in pursuit as far as Dan. At night, he and his servants deployed against them and defeated them; and he pursued them as far as Hobah, which is north of Damascus. He brought back all the possessions; he also brought back his kinsman Lot and his possessions, and the women and the rest of the people.” (ibid. 14:14-16)

Abram gathers his household and sets out at mortal risk to rescue the nephew from whom he had parted. The Midrash Tanchuma captures this perfectly: “Was Lot actually Abraham’s brother? No, indeed! This statement is simply proof of Abraham’s humility. Though Abraham and Lot had quarreled, as it is written: ‘And there was a strife between the herdsmen of Abraham’s cattle and the herdsmen of Lot’s cattle’, he called him brother nevertheless, as it is said: ‘For we are brethren’.” (Midrash Tanchuma, Lech Lecha, 13)

Love that transcends distance

Later, when God plans to destroy Sodom, He remembers Abraham’s love for Lot and saves him from the inferno. The separation had not diminished their bond – if anything, it had clarified it.

It is an art to know when brothers need to part. It is an art to know how to part in love, generously, without blame. And it is true heroism to know that despite separation – perhaps because of it – one remains there for the other.

Lior Tal Sadeh is an educator, writer, and author of “What Is Above, What Is Below” (Carmel, 2022). He hosts the daily “Source of Inspiration” podcast, produced by Beit Avi Chai.

For more insights into Parashat Lech-Lecha, listen to “Source of Inspiration” (in Hebrew).

Translation of most Hebrew texts sourced from Sefaria.org

Main Photo: braham Sees Sodom in Flames\ Wikipedia